They Say It's Your Birthday, We're Gonna Have A Good Time
Family lore has it that my mother kept going to the hospital only to be told she wasn't ready yet (well, I guess really I wasn't ready yet) and sent home.
She returned for the final time - they decided to admit her. And I was damn near born in the elevator on the way up to maternity. My mother told me, "You take a long time to make up your mind, but once you do -look out! You move fast!"
It's taken me a long time to make up my mind, but I have come to some decisons about getting old. When I get old:
I will NEVERNEVERNEVERNEVER ever belong to the Red Hat Society.
I will continue to go out, on a rare occasion, mind you, and toilet paper someone’s home or car, no matter how old I am and how immature others say such an activity is.
My last tp-ing adventure was several years ago - and no - that's not it in the picture -that's someone else's work (mine is much more thorough and messier). Clearly though, I need to set the right tone for my new decade and get going with the TP. Bloggers beware!
I WILL stop frowning at these youngsters at the grocery store who address me as “Ma’m.”
I will keep on keeping on!
And blast my stereo!
And order martinis and shots of jack (not together) instead of sipping wine "like a lady"!
And race down the freeway at a reckless speed whenever the coppers aren't about!
And jump in puddles when it rains - no matter who is watching and no matter what I'm wearing!
But I will NOT go swimming in Half Moon Bay at midnight in November ever again no matter how old I get. (Once was quite enough!)